"Difficult People" Are System Messengers (Part 5 of 5)

Issue 5 - Systemic Distress Series

5 minute read

Continuing our Systemic Distress Series. Last week we explored how slowing down accelerates results. This week, we're diving into what reactive behaviors really tell us about our systems - and why what looks like a "difficult person" might be your greatest teacher.

The Hidden Message in Reactivity

Have you ever thought, "If people were just more professional, everything would work better?"

I did. Just this week. And it taught me something crucial about system intelligence.

Here's what healthcare leaders miss about difficult behaviours:

The Traditional Response Trap

Most healthcare leaders are taught to handle difficult behaviour through:

• "Professional standards" enforcement
• Performance improvement plans
• Behavioural coaching
• Progressive discipline
• Documentation trails

But have you noticed these command-and-control linear leadership approaches no longer work? Why? Because we're treating symptoms while ignoring the system crying out for attention.

The Real Cost of Misreading Signals

• Errors increase.
• Staff turnover rises.
• Collaboration decreases.
• Patient satisfaction drops.

A Personal Perspective: System Signals in Action

Let me tell you what happened to me this week.

As a patient, I called a healthcare office seeking some basic information. Simple enough, right? What unfolded was a masterclass in system distress signals.

The manager who took my call was immediately hostile. They cut me off mid-sentence, raised their voice, and responded with aggression that seemed disproportionate to my simple request. The verbal attack and rudeness intensified when I tried to correct some misinformation.

My first thought? "This is horse shi$!" I thought. And it was. It was also unprofessional and unacceptable.

But as I sat with it (after my nervous system settled), I recognized something familiar - the same patterns I see in healthcare systems under extreme pressure. This wasn't just one "difficult" manager. This was system intelligence screaming to be heard.

The intensity of their reaction revealed:

• A department drowning in demands.
• Broken communication systems.
• Support structures failing.
• A leader at their limits.
• A system in survival.

Here's the truth: While the behaviour wasn't okay, viewing it as just a "difficult person" misses the crucial system intelligence trying to emerge. And it also doesn't see where the operation needs a relief valve regardless of demand.

Breaking Free: The System-Aware Approach

When we take a systems approach to reactivity it:

• Increase patient satisfaction
• Reduces safety events.
• Improves retention.

Here's how to start:

See Beyond the Surface

• Notice patterns of reactivity across teams.
• Track when and where tensions spike.
• Read resistance as data.
• Do a system reset.

Create Reset Space

• Build in regulatory pauses before reactions.
• Install system-level pressure releases.
• Create spaces for conversations.
• Design collaborative solutions.

Make it Systemic

• Move from individual blame to system understanding.
• Transform corrective actions into system corrections.
• Build team capacity for reading system signals.
• Create cultures of collective wisdom.

What? So What? Now What?

What You're Learning: Reactivity isn't just about difficult people - it's system intelligence trying to emerge.

Why It's Important: When healthcare leaders shift from managing difficult behaviours to reading system signals:

• Team trust rebuilds naturally.
• Communication pathways clear.
• Innovation emerges from conflict.
• Solutions arise that scale with ease.

What to Do Now:

• Map your department's reactivity patterns.
• Notice where system pressure points cluster.
• Create one new pressure release valve this week.
• Track how system awareness shifts when you engage. 

That's it for this week. 

Remember to create a safe space for yourself and your team.

Warmly, Trace

Here are 3 ways I can help when you're ready:

1. Listen to the Podcast: Join our weekly conversations [podcast link]
2. Subscribe to This Newsletter: Get weekly insights [newsletter link]
3. The 30-Minute System Reset Session: Get Consultation [System Reset Session]  

   In just one focused session, discover how to:

   ✓ Build teams that deliver the excellence you envisioned
   ✓ Transform toxic departments into retention magnets
   ✓ Become the leader you always knew you could be
   ✓ Create environments where staff choose to stay